Author and good friend, Stacey Gustafson, is guest blogger today! She shares an excerpt from her latest hilarious book, Are You Still Kidding Me. Scheduled for release on September 18, it is currently available for pre-order on Amazon for $.99. https://amzn.to/2uPeqZX
I Netflix Cheated on My Husband
I tried ways to end my deception, but nothing worked. To protect my indiscretion, I routinely deleted my Internet browser history, shredded phone bills and swore my friends to secrecy. I Netflix cheated on my husband.
How did this begin you ask? I blame it on the old-fashioned dinner-and-a-movie routine. Our choices had boiled down to The Lego Batman Movie and Fifty Shades Darker. Why were we wasting our money on this crap? So, we traded a night out for a night in.
It all started so innocently.
Cable television options are limitless. Netflix, Amazon Prime, Hulu, HBO Now, the list goes on. No need to go to the theater when you can indulge in more than fifty hours, or five seasons of thirteen episodes. Intriguing shows like Shooter, Stranger Things, Dexter, It’s Always Sunny in Philadelphia, and House of Cards sucked us in faster than a fur ball to a Dust Buster.
Netflix, where’ve you been my whole life?
We clicked through cable channels and realized we’d only scraped the surface of the Netflix barrel. Continue reading
I scanned the letter from my doctor about my recent bone density test. I knew going in what the result would be. My mother fell several times as she got older and unsteady on her feet. Never broke a bone. In fact, with the exception of my brother who cracked his thumb skidding around a vacant parking lot on a go-cart back in the ’60s, and my daughter who snapped her arm at five years old in a fall off a porch ledge, our family was fracture free.
Towards the bottom of the letter were instructions to call to make a plan going forward. A plan? For what? I reread the first paragraph. There it was: “…you have osteoporosis.” Continue reading
PART II – OUT ON THE TOWNIE
I practiced my new/old sport around the neighborhood for a few days until I felt confident to take Tallulah out for a spin on the trail. When the day came, I wrestled the rack onto the trunk of my sedan, secured my new companion into place and headed out. Continue reading
PART I – TOWNIE TEST RIDE
On a long weekend visit to my daughter’s home in the California foothills, I shared an entry from my bucket list.
“I’m not getting any younger,” I told Kristen. I’ve made up my mind. I’m getting a bike.”
“You should get a Townie,” she said. She tapped her phone screen a couple of times. Up popped the grooviest turquoise colored two-wheeler I had ever seen. I knew I had to have it. Continue reading